Daisypath Anniversary Years Ticker

Tuesday, February 02, 2010

Why my children's school stinks...

So there has been one over-riding thing that I can't stand about Texas. It is my children's school. It is everything that was/is bad about education today.

Here are my problems:

1. They use a bull horn to communicate with the children. Obviously their method of discipline of shouting children down isn't working very well.

2. Communication is terrible. They are so busy using the bull horn they can't answer email or phone messages.

3. Positive discipline is unheard of... instead of the arm on the shoulder and a admonition to try it again the right way if a child is caught riding their bike or running on campus, they use the old, "GET OFF YER BIKE!!!!"

4. They go on one field trip in five years of school.

5. They use television excessively in the classroom.

6. A kid called Carolyn the B-word on the bus and the response of the teacher was "that is normal for this age." Normal, maybe, something that should go uncorrected, NAY.

7. They are allowed one 10-minute period outside a day. They don't go out if it rains, is slightly cold, there is any dampness on the grass, or a kid talks out of turn.

8. Tests are ***IT*** at this school. They teach to the test, practice for the tests, stress kids out about the tests, tie everyone's worth to the tests.

I could go on and on. This chaps my hide every day.

Here in Texas they salute and pledge allegiance to the Texas flag every day. We, being the blasphemous Texans we are, changed the pledge...

The real Texas pledge:

Honor the Texas flag. I pledge allegiance to thee Texas. One state, under God, one and indivisible.

(funny story: the kids that lead that pledge all say "I pledge allegiance to THE Texas" instead of "thee Texas." We thought that was the right words and that the state of Texas was run by morons. We now know the right words but still aren't convinced on the Moron part)

Our new pledge:

Honor the Kohrville. I pledge allegiance to THE Kohrville. One school, in Texas with no recess.

We say it whenever we pass the school. It makes us feel better.

So does saying, "Boys and girls, it is entirely too LOUD in here" with a heavy southern drawl. It makes us laugh.

Also, we eat a lot of ice cream.